


Retribution

by barbaXbenson



Series: Barson [2]
Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, Case Fic, Established Relationship, F/M, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Sequel, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-25
Updated: 2018-05-13
Packaged: 2019-04-07 16:50:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,936
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14085333
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/barbaXbenson/pseuds/barbaXbenson
Summary: A string of brutal rapes/murders hits close to home for Manhattan SVU and the squad must work to find the killer before one of their own becomes the next victim. *This is a continuation of my story Uncharted Territory, but you won't be lost if you haven't read it.  Canon compliant through season 18.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a part of my efforts to move my work over from FFN. I'm probably going to take the opportunity to make some tweaks/edits from the original version.
> 
> Just a warning that this one is darker than Uncharted Territory.

Olivia dropped her bag on her living room floor with a sigh. "We made it. Finally." She tilted her head from side to side, trying to to loosen the tension in her neck that had developed after several hours in the car.

"Thank God." Rafael let his own bag hit the floor with a thud as he closed her apartment door behind them. "Remind me next time that in the summer everyone goes to the Hamptons for the weekend which means that everyone is coming back from the Hamptons on Sunday night."

Traffic had been hellacious coming back into the city and their journey had taken them hours longer than it should have.

She desperately wanted to drop an "I told you so," but she resisted.

After the particularly stressful and emotionally draining Zach Cahill case, they'd decided to go on their first weekend away, just to relax and be together as a couple, leaving behind the Lieutenant and the ADA. Olivia had suggested going upstate, but Rafael didn't "do rustic," so they'd gone to the Hamptons instead.

Olivia had been nervous at first, worried that outside of the city, outside of their jobs, that they'd find that they didn't have much to talk about, but her worries had been unfounded. She found that even though they'd known each other for years, and been friends nearly as long, there was still much to learn about Rafael Barba, and she'd enjoyed spending a couple of uninterrupted days doing just that.

"Thank you." He pulled her to him, wrapping his arms around her waist.

"For what?"

"Not saying 'I told you so' even though I know you really want to."

She laughed, enjoying the fact that he knew her so well.

"It was a great weekend though, right?" He nuzzled her neck, placing kisses near her jawline.

"Oh yeah," She tilted her head back, giving him better access to her neck, remembering how fantastic their beach rental had been. They'd made excellent use of the king size bed, the couch, the floor, the kitchen table…

"Noah?" He asked, still working on her neck.

"At your mom's until tomorrow."

"Good." He spun them so that he had her back pressed up against the apartment door, his hands resting on either side of her. His lips worked hers hungrily, only pausing to pull her tank top over her head. Olivia was starting to work his belt buckle when her phone began ringing in her purse. "Ignore it." He told her breathlessly, his lips working their way across her collarbone.

"I can't, what if something's happened with Noah?"

He couldn't argue with that. He moved out of the way so she could cross the room and pull her phone out of her bag. Her brows knitted, a mix of confusion and concern, when she saw the screen. "Chief?"

Hearing this, Rafael looked up. She wasn't supposed to be on call this weekend, so it must be something important.

"Lieutenant." Deputy Chief Dodds didn't sound happy. "I know you're technically still off duty, but I need you to get down here."

"Okay. Where's 'here'?"

"I'll text you the address. Oh," Dodds added as an afterthought. "And I'm sure Barba is there with you. Tell him to get his ass down here too."

* * *

Olivia badged the uniformed officer standing near the caution tape that was keeping nosey pedestrians back from the crime scene. "He's with me." She tossed her head toward Barba and the uni nodded, raising the tape and allowing them to duck under.

She'd noticed the ME van as she pulled up, so she knew she wouldn't be speaking with the victim. CSU had already arrived as well. They were combing the alleyway and taking photos, aided by portable lights that had been set up to illuminate the dark alley. Olivia spotted Dodds off to the side talking on the phone, so she walked straight to the body that was on the ground in the middle of the alley, covered by a white sheet.

Rafael hung back a little, busying himself on his phone. He'd been to a few crime scenes and his share of autopsies over the years, but he wasn't altogether comfortable being in close proximity to dead bodies. He still wasn't even sure what he was doing here.

"What do we got?" Olivia asked a uni nearby. She noted his nametag, Bradley. He barely looked old enough to be out of high school, let alone the academy.

"Busboy found her when he was taking out the trash after closing." Officer Bradley nodded toward a doorway that Olivia assumed was the back door to a restaurant. "Looks like she was strangled."

"I'm here, so I assume there were signs of sexual assault?"

"Well, she's nude, and well, um…" A flush rose over the young officer's neck and cheeks. "She has a knife in her, well, you know…"

"Jesus." Olivia said before she could stop herself. Just when she thought she'd seen the worst of the worst, there was always some sick bastard willing to up the ante.

"Lieutenant." Dodds was finally off the phone and he approached her, looking tired. Officer Bradley wisely took this chance to step away.

"Chief. What's this all about?" The crime was brutal, but it was something any of her detectives could have handled and definitely didn't seem to warrant the presence of the Deputy Chief, or Barba for that matter.

"The vic's an ADA, out of Brooklyn."

Rafael's head jerked up when he heard that. "What?" He stepped closer as Olivia knelt down and pulled back the sheet. His stomach rolled. "Jaclyn?" He turned to Dodds with fire in his eyes. "What the fuck, Dodds? You could have warned me."

"Watch it, Counselor." Dodds warned Barba before turning to Olivia. "Jaclyn Moore."

"You knew her?" Olivia looked up at Rafael.

He nodded grimly. "Yeah, she started maybe a year before I left."

Olivia turned back to the body. Even in death she was pretty, soft features and caramel colored skin that now had a gray tint to it. One of the tech lights hit something shiny and she pulled the sheet back further. Her ADA's badge was laid open across her stomach. Olivia had wondered how they ID'd her so fast, but now she had her answer.

It was a tragedy in and of itself if a woman, who happened to be an ADA, was brutalized and killed in such a manner. It added a whole other layer if she was targeted because she was an ADA. It was looking like this was the latter.

"Whoever did this wanted us to know immediately." Dodds shook his head. "I've already heard from the commissioner, the mayor, and the DA. Barba, he said you're at my disposal. If there's anything you're working on that can be handed off, do it."

Rafael nodded his agreement, doing his best to keep his gaze off of his former colleague. Olivia noticed this and dropped the sheet, covering Jaclyn up again, much to his relief.

"Does she have family?" Olivia asked, standing fully.

"Her mom's in Jersey." Rafael answered before Dodds could.

Chief Dodds gave Rafael a look before turning to Olivia. "The Brooklyn DA is doing the notification. I just hope he makes it there before the press gets wind of this."

"Lieu." They looked up and saw Carisi making his way toward them. "Sorry it took me so long. What do we got?"

As Olivia gave Carisi the rundown Dodds looked over at Rafael. The ADA was looking a little peaked. "You can handle this, right Barba? Because if you're too close to this tell me now and I'll call someone else."

Rafael's eyes narrowed. "I can handle it." He said forcefully.

"Good. 'Cause we gotta nail this son of a bitch. Fast."

"Is Brooklyn gonna push to take over this?" Carisi asked once he was filled in. "She was one of theirs."

"Maybe." Olivia once again looked down at the sheet. "But she's ours now."

* * *

"I have to go to the station, do you want me to drop you at home?" Olivia asked Rafael an hour later as she maneuvered her car out onto the street.

"I could go with you." He offered.

"There's not much work for you at this point. And one of us should get some sleep."

"Then, yeah, I guess home's fine." He acquiesced.

She looked over at him, the streetlights bouncing off of his handsome face. A handsome face that now seemed troubled. "Were you close to her? Jaclyn?"

"We were friendly, flirted a bit I guess." He answered honestly. "Had drinks a few times, but nothing ever happened."

Olivia knew that the jealousy that bubbled up in her was ridiculous and unwarranted, but it bubbled all the same. They were quiet for a few blocks, but then she spoke again. "You stopped receiving threats, right? I mean, you told us you did, but that wasn't just so we'd lift your detail?"

He smiled just because he knew that was something he'd do, and if the threats hadn't stopped with the arrest of Felipe Heredio, he probably would have. "Yes. Well, mostly." He added in the interest of complete honesty.

"What do you mean, mostly?" She braked for a red light and turned to look at him, worry clouding her features. Worry, and a little bit of anger, he decided.

"The blatant, consistent ones stopped, but I'm an ADA, Liv. I get threats, but it's all just the regular stuff. Putting people in prison tends to piss them and their loved ones off." He shrugged like it was no big deal. "Just because an ADA was killed doesn't mean there's some guy out there targeting all ADA's."

"It doesn't mean that there isn't." She countered, putting the car in motion when the light changed. It had been one of her first thoughts once it became apparent that Jaclyn's job played a role in her death. What if Rafael was a target? She couldn't bear the thought.

"It was probably someone she put away, or someone in connection to someone she put away, you'll see."

"Actually, you will. I need you to go to the Brooklyn DA's office with Carisi in the morning. You still have connections there. They might give up her files more easily with you there."

"Okay." He agreed, and not just because he'd been ordered to by the DA and Dodds. Jaclyn had been a great lawyer and a friend. She didn't deserve what had happened to her and he would do everything he could to make sure the person responsible paid for it.

She pulled up in front of his apartment building and put the car in park. "I'm sorry this is how our weekend ended."

The corner of his mouth ticked up in a rueful smile. "I almost feel like it wouldn't be us if it didn't end like this." He unbuckled his seatbelt and leaned over, kissing her softly. "Be safe, mi guerrera."

"You too." She said softly.

He reached for the door handle, but her voice stopped him. "Raf?"

"Yeah?" He asked, turning back toward her.

"Are you okay? It's hard enough when the victim is a stranger, but..."

Rafael sighed. "I'm...sad." He decided that the most basic of emotions was all that could be used to describe how he was feeling. "We know these sick fucks are out there, we deal with it every day, but…" He shook his head. "Sad and pissed." He amended. "But yes, I'm okay."

"Well, I'm here if you need me." She didn't want to press too hard. He'd just began acting like himself again, finally able to begin moving on from Melanie Tullis's tragic suicide. She knew she mostly had Cahill's conviction to thank for that, but she hoped she played a small part in helping him heal.

"I know. Thank you." He gave her another quick kiss before getting out of the car. She waited, watching as he walked into the building. Max, the weekend doorman, gave her a small wave as he held the door open for Rafael. She waved back and then put the car in gear, merging into Park Avenue traffic which was still going strong late on a Sunday night.

* * *

"Melinda." Olivia said when she and Fin walked into the autopsy suite the following morning. "What are we looking at?" She knew it was probably too soon for Melinda to have much, but Carisi and Rafael had gone to the Brooklyn DA's office and Amanda was with CSU tossing Jaclyn's apartment. She couldn't just sit on her hands and wait for them to come up with something. She needed to be on the ground, working the case.

"I'm just getting started." Melinda put down the scalpel she'd just picked up in preparation to make the standard Y incision in Jaclyn's chest.

"I know, but this is an important one. What's your preliminary?"

Melinda was well aware that this was top priority, it was the reason the young ADA had skipped to the front of the line. There were several other bodies waiting in drawers who had come in first, but just as Olivia and Barba had their orders from the top, the doctor did too.

She chose not to voice this, as from the look of Olivia's tired eyes, the Lieutenant had been working all night, and she knew she didn't need a friend sniping at her over something petty. Instead she picked up a clipboard where she'd taken notes during her preliminary examination of the body.

"Based on body temp at the scene, time of death was somewhere between 7 and 10pm last night. External examination puts cause of death as strangulation. Most likely from a rope of some kind." She gestured to the ligature marks on the Jaclyn's neck. "No defensive wounds which is strange for a ligature strangulation."

"She didn't even try to pull at the rope?" Fin asked.

"Doesn't seem like it." Melinda answered. "CSU scraped under her fingernails, so maybe we'll find something, but look." She picked up one of Jaclyn's hands to show them. "Her manicure is intact. Not a chip. I have to wait for the tox screen, but my guess is she was drugged before she was strangled."

"Most rapists who strangle their victims get off on the struggle. What's the point if they're already out cold?" Olivia questioned.

"Well, it wasn't a rape, if that helps."

"I thought you said she had a knife inside her?" Fin asked Olivia.

"She did." Olivia turned to Melinda, confusion on her face.

"Well, yes, in the strictest definitions she was raped by a foreign object, the knife." Melinda walked over to a side table and picked up an evidence bag.

"Is that a…" Fin looked closer. "A steak knife?"

Melinda nodded. "You might see if your victim is missing one from her home." She sat the knife back on the table. "But there were no other signs of sexual assault, at least at a glance. The knife did some damage so it's possible that's obscuring things, but I don't think so. It was almost like an afterthought."

"Afterthought?"

"Yes, based on blood flow, or lack thereof, she was already dead when he inserted the knife. And usually with this type of mutilation the victim is assaulted repeatedly, but the knife was simply inserted and left there." Melinda explained. "I'd say someone went out of their way to turn this into a sex crime."

"Which means they wanted us to catch it." Fin concluded.

The thought filled Olivia with dread. This was all carefully orchestrated and she was afraid that it was just the beginning.


	2. Chapter 2

When Olivia and Fin returned to the squad room after their visit to the ME's office they found Rafael and Sonny at the conference table. Mountains of files covered the table's surface and several evidence boxes filled with even more files were stacked on the floor.

"We got the files." Rafael deadpanned when he saw the duo, taking a sip from a paper coffee cup.

"And then some." Olivia picked one up off the top of the stack. "All of these are Jaclyn's cases?" It seemed that Jaclyn was even more overworked than Rafael was.

"Well, this," Rafael held up the large 2 inch binder he was reading through. "Is all the threats she's received."

"We're starting with most recent cases and threats." Carisi explained. "But we could really use some more eyes. It's going to take days, maybe weeks, as it is to go through all of these."

"Fin?" Olivia asked, even though it wasn't really a question. Fin sighed and sat at the table. Carisi slid a stack of files in his direction. "And Rollins should be back from the victim's apartment soon. If it still seems like too much I can pull in a few unis." She picked up a stack of files for herself and looked over at Rafael. "Barba, can I talk to you for a sec?"

Rafael stood, picking up his binder and coffee, and followed her to her office. "What's going on?"

She dropped the files on her desk. "We had an interesting talk with Melinda."

"Oh?"

She filled him in on what they'd learned and their suspicion that this had been deliberately staged as a sex crime. "It seems as if whoever did this wanted it to be our case."

"Ours as in yours?"

"Or yours." She paused a moment. "Did anyone else know that you two were close? Were friends?"

He shrugged. "We weren't besties or anything, but it wasn't a state secret that we were friendly." He paused as it became clear what she was getting at. "You don't think we'll find the answer in her case files, do you?"

"No, but we have to do our due diligence and go through them all anyway." She eyed Jaclyn's threat binder that he still held. "You have one of those, don't you?"

"No," he shook his head, but her relief was short lived. "I have two."

* * *

A while later Rafael was stretched out on Olivia's couch, still slogging through the binder, and she was at her desk reading through her share of Jaclyn's files when Amanda knocked on her doorframe. "Hey, Lieutenant. Counselor." She added when she spotted Barba looking quite comfortable on the couch.

"Rollins." He nodded.

"Hey," Olivia looked up, slipping her glasses off and letting them land on the open file on her desk. "Did you find anything at the apartment?"

"No sign of forced entry, no sign of a struggle, but we think she was taken from there."

"Why?" Rafael sat up, interested now.

"Her purse, keys, and phone were all on the kitchen counter." Rollins explained. "Who goes anywhere without those?"

"So she let this guy in? It was someone she knew?" Nothing about this case was making any sense to Olivia. Maybe the ADA badge was to make them think it was revenge when it was really someone she was close to.

"Or someone who knew how to break in undetected." Rafael supplied. "He could have picked the lock and waited inside for her."

"If they did, they were good. She had two deadbolts." Rollins said. "My vote is that she opened the door."

"Barba, did anyone at the DA's office mention a boyfriend?" Olivia asked.

He shook his head. "They said she seemed married to the job, but she could have just been keeping it private." He met her gaze as they shared a knowing look.

"Well, we'll go through her phone records. Maybe we'll find something there."

"Her building has a security camera on the entrance, we pulled the footage. We also have officers canvassing the neighborhood. We might get lucky."

"We could use a bit of luck right about now." Olivia said. "Anything else?"

"There was one thing missing from the apartment." Amanda answered. "After I got your text, Lieutenant, I checked for missing knives. Her set was short one steak knife." She held up her phone to show Olivia a photo of the knife set in the apartment.

"That set matches the one we found inside the victim. So odds are she was killed in the apartment."

"He killed her in Brooklyn Heights and then transported her to Manhattan to dump her in an alley?" Rafael asked in disbelief. "There are plenty of alleys in Brooklyn worthy of disposing a body in."

"It just gives more credence to our theory."

"What theory?" Rollins asked.

"That whoever did this purposely staged it as a sex crime in Manhattan so that we would catch the case." Olivia explained for the second time that morning.

"Seriously?" Rollins went over the facts in her head. "I guess it plays, but why?"

"Your guess is as good as ours."

"You know," Rafael said once Rollins had left to start going through the security footage from Jaclyn's building. "You're so wrapped up in thinking this has something to do with me that you're missing something."

"What's that?"

"That it could have something to do with you." He'd tried not to think about it, but the fear that she could be the target of all of this had settled deep in his gut and wouldn't go away. "You could just as easily be at the center of this as I could."

"And so could Rollins, or Carisi, or Fin, but none of us knew the victim. You did."

Rafael sighed and laid his hands on the back of one of her visitors' chairs, squeezing the fabric in frustration. He guessed the situation would be funny if it wasn't so fucked up. They both only had concern for the other, with little to none to spare for themselves. "Will you just promise me that you'll be careful?"

"I'm always careful," she assured him. "But I'll promise if you'll do the same."

"You're the one out on the streets, quite often with a gun pointed at you. What could I possibly do that's dangerous?"

"Oh, nothing, I guess. It's not like you give criminals your home address and tell them to come by whenever they want." She gave him a pointed look.

He regretted ever telling her that, but at the time he'd been two and half scotches deep and had been trying to impress her with how tough he was. "Okay, fine. I promise to no longer hand out my address to criminals."

Olivia supposed that was as good as she was going to get.

He grabbed his jacket and slipped it on. "I have to get to the office. I have a motion hearing this afternoon and I'm barely prepped."

"I thought Dodds told you to hand off everything?"

"He told me to hand off everything that could be, and wouldn't you know, it would just take too long to bring another DA up to speed on my current cases." He said with a smirk. "I can handle it." He added when he saw the concern cross her face. "Like you said last night, at this point there isn't much work for me on this. And do you really want another ADA handling the trials of rapists you worked so hard to arrest?"

She hated feeding his ego, but he was right. He was the best and she wanted the best prosecuting her cases. Was catching one perp worth it if several others walked? "I guess you're right."

"Liv, we're at work. You know how those words get me going." He teased and she rolled her eyes.

"I thought you had work to do?"

He put his hands on her desk and threw a quick glance over his shoulder to make sure no one out in the squad room was watching before leaning over and placing a soft kiss on her lips. It was no longer a secret that they were together, but their bosses had made it clear that they were to keep it out of the office. "I flagged some pages in the binder." He said, standing up straight. "I think you should start with those."

* * *

Olivia sighed and rubbed her eyes, doing her best to straighten and stretch out her spine. She'd spent the bulk of her day hunched over her desk digging through Jaclyn's files, even though she still believed it to be a waste of time. The only reprieve, and she used the term loosely, had been when Jaclyn's mother, Anita, had come in to speak to her. The poor woman was doing her best to hold it together, but Olivia had seen it enough times to know that the break was coming.

Anita had echoed Jaclyn's coworkers – she was a sweet girl who lived for her work. She was sure that Jaclyn hadn't been dating anyone, but she gave Olivia the names of her two closest friends, thinking they might know things that the prosecutor hadn't wanted to discuss with her mother. Olivia had reached out to them and arranged to speak with them the following day.

She'd fielded no less than three calls from Dodds, who was not pleased with their lack of progress. She knew he had bosses who were breathing down his neck, but she couldn't manifest leads just to please the powers that be. Their one bit of evidence was grainy security cam footage showing a man dressed in all black entering Jaclyn's building within the time of death window, but he knew where the camera was and made sure it didn't catch his face. He never came back out so they assumed he used the rear exit.

Olivia crossed her fingers that they'd have something more when the forensics came back. Otherwise, they were screwed.

Her eyes caught the picture of Noah that sat on her desk and she felt a pang in her chest. She hadn't seen him since she'd left for work Friday morning. She'd loved her weekend away with Rafael, but she missed her son like crazy. Checking the time, she decided that it was acceptable for her to head home.

She slipped a few files into her bag, planning to read through them after Noah was asleep, and stopped in the squad room on her way out. All three of her detectives were hunched over files just as she had been. She was impressed by how much the stacks of files to be read had dwindled.

"Call it a night, guys." She told them. "Take some of these with you if you want to keep working, but there's no need to sit here all night."

Olivia left her squad car parked at the station, opting instead to take the subway home. She didn't have the energy to fight through the evening traffic. Plus on the train she could shut off her brain for a minute, or at least she could try.

After what seemed like forever she finally stepped off the elevator on her floor and ran into Lucy. "Lucy, what are you-?"

"Have a great night, Olivia." Lucy said with a knowing smile before stepping onto the elevator Olivia had just vacated.

What Olivia found when she opened the door to her apartment made tears sting her eyes. Rafael was in the kitchen at the stove; he'd removed his tie and rolled up the sleeves of his blue and white gingham shirt. Noah sat on the counter, watching Rafael as he cooked.

"Here you go." Rafael was telling Noah, pinching some kind of seasoning into Noah's palm. "Dump it in." He instructed and Noah tipped his hand, letting the seasoning fall into the pot that simmered on the burner. "Great job, amigo!" Rafael praised, stirring the seasoning into the dish, and Noah grinned proudly from ear to ear.

They both turned toward her when they heard the door close and Noah squealed. "Mommy!"

"Go get her." Rafael lifted Noah off the counter and sat his feet on the floor.

He ran to Olivia and she picked him up, settling him on her hip and kissing his cheek. "Hi, sweet boy."

"Mommy, I cooked!" Noah proclaimed proudly as Olivia carried him into the kitchen.

"The kid insisted on making you dinner." Rafael placed a welcoming peck on her lips.

"Well, I think he's found his calling. It smells amazing." She turned to Noah. "How was your weekend with abuelita?"

"I like abuelita. She gives me ice cream."

Olivia laughed, happy that Noah had Lucia in his life. She'd often felt guilty that Noah didn't really have any extended family. It was just another reason to be grateful that Rafael had come into their lives.

"I believe I heard somewhere that you painted your mom a picture?" Rafael reminded him.

Noah gasped, remembering, and wiggled to be let down.

"Okay, okay." Olivia laughed again, setting Noah on the floor. He took off for his room in search for Olivia's gift.

"You're amazing, you know that?" Olivia slipped her hands beneath his suspenders and pulled him close.

"Yes, I know, but I still like it when you tell me." The side of his mouth pulled up in the half grin that she found irresistible.

Still gripping his suspenders she placed her lips over the grin. "And so humble too."

* * *

Rafael looked up from his laptop as Olivia walked into the living room after having put Noah to bed. "That was faster than usual."

"I think all the excitement from the weekend finally caught up with him." Olivia sat next to him on the couch, picking her glass of wine up off of the coffee table and taking a sip, closing her eyes for a moment to savor it. Then with a sigh she sat it back down and reached for the files she'd brought home with her, but Rafael put a hand on her arm.

"What about you?" He closed his computer and set it to the side, then pulled her back against him, massaging her shoulders. "When is the last time you slept?"

"Um…" She thought about it. "I caught a couple hours in the bunk room this morning."

She could feel him shake his head. "You work too hard."

She turned to look at him over her shoulder. "Hello pot, kettle, nice to meet you."

"Touche." He laughed. "How did the rest of today go? I didn't hear anything from you, so I'm guessing no new leads? Not even with the security footage?"

Olivia shook her head and once again relaxed back against him. "Only grainy footage of someone who could be our guy entering the building, but not coming out. You can't see his face."

"Perfect." Rafael sighed.

"Exactly. You know I would never blame a victim, but I do find myself wondering why wouldn't she live in a building with better security? I mean, with the size of that threat binder, you'd think she'd want to be more careful."

"It was probably all that she could afford. Why do you think I sold my soul in the private sector for years before switching sides?" Self contempt ran through his words, but he cleared his throat and continued. "But not Jaclyn. She became a lawyer to do good and that's what she always did."

He felt her grow heavier against him and her breathing deepen. He smiled, leaning down to whisper in her ear. "Liv."

"Hmm?"

"Let's go to bed." He kissed her cheek before helping her to her feet. As much as he'd love to, their equal statures would make carrying her difficult, so instead he wrapped an arm around her as they shuffled to the bedroom.

Once they were tucked in bed she turned toward him, the streetlights shining through the window just enough that he could see her brown eyes. "It's not gone."

"What's that?"

"Your soul." She said sleepily. "I think you've done more than enough good to earn it back."

He laid his hand on her cheek and kissed her softly, a silent thank you. "Good night, my love."

Olivia drifted off to sleep quickly, but Rafael stared at the ceiling, thinking of all of the despicable people he'd fought to keep out of jail early in his career. The sleazebags who, thanks to savings and smart investments, still paid for his suits, scotch, and Park Avenue apartment.

He looked over at Olivia, her beautiful face peaceful with sleep, and prayed to God, a god he wasn't even sure he believed in, that she was right.


	3. Chapter 3

"Morning, Lieu." Carisi hopped to his feet the second Olivia walked into the squad room the next morning, falling into step with her as she walked to her office. "ME's report is in."

"And?" Olivia dropped her bag on her desk and looked at him expectantly.

"Warner found a crazy amount of Phenobarbital in the vic's system."

"The epilepsy drug?" She pulled from somewhere in the recesses of her mind.

"That's the one." He commended like she'd gotten a trivia question right. "It was definitely enough to render the vic unconscious, maybe even kill her if she hadn't been strangled first. Warner also found a needle mark hidden in the ligature marks on her neck."

"Maybe he strangled her to try to hide the fact that she was drugged?"

He looked skeptical. "But wouldn't anybody who's watched a cop show know that we'd run a tox screen anyway?"

"Yes, but some people are just dumb. You should know that by now." She stopped and took a breath. "Sorry, Carisi. It's just this case...I've already heard from Dodds this morning. They're threatening to kick it to Homicide if we don't come up with something fast."

"It's only been a day."

She shrugged. "It's an ADA, and not just an ADA, but a pretty, young ADA who looks really great on the front page of a newspaper next to a headline announcing that we have no leads."

"Well, I may have something." He dropped the file he carried on her desk. "When I read the report I remembered one of Jaclyn's cases that I read through yesterday. A dad, David Housman, robbed a pharmacy to get meds for his kid, ended up accidentally killing the pharmacist."

"Let me guess, the kid has epilepsy." Olivia flipped through the file.

"You got it. He was stealing pills, nothing injectible, but still, he was released two weeks ago. Since the death was an accident Jaclyn plead him out, and with good behavior…" Sonny let it hang.

"Good work, Carisi." She handed him back the file. "Fin and Rollins caught a case last night so you're on your own for now. Run it down."

He hurried out of the room, almost as if he was taking her literally, and she sank into her chair. It seemed a little too easy, but sometimes they were. And even if this wasn't their guy they still had to rule it out. She'd learned early on that most of the time police work consisted of proving that someone  _didn't_  do the crime they were investigating rather than the opposite.

* * *

"You have no right to bring me here!"

Olivia looked up from her paperwork when she heard the deep voice roar through the squad room and she immediately went to investigate.

Carisi was leading the owner of the voice toward interrogation, but was having a tough time of it since the man was resisting the whole way. This man with his greasy hair, unruly beard, and dirty, ill-fitting clothes, barely resembled the photo of David Housman that had been in the file Sonny had showed her.

"Let me go!" Housman yelled, trying to pull his cuffed hands from Carisi's grip.

"Mr. Housman." Olivia said in a soothing tone, stepping toward the man. "We just want to ask you a few questions."

"Fuck you, lady!" Housman spun, jerking out of Carisi's grip and slamming into Olivia, sending her into flying into the sharp corner where the two walls met at the head of the hallway.

"Shit! Lieu are you okay?" Sonny grabbed Housman and dragged him the short distance to the first interrogation room, opening the door and shoving him in. "Stay in there." He slammed the door and rushed back to Olivia who was running her hand over her left shoulder. "I'm so sorry, I should have-"

"I'm fine, Carisi." Olivia cut him off. "I've had worse. Trust me." She walked over to the window to look at Housman who was pacing laps around the interrogation room, muttering to himself. "What's his deal? Doesn't seem like someone who was just trying to provide for his child."

"He picked up a meth habit when he was on the inside. Was livin' in a halfway house when he first got out, but he only lasted three days before they kicked him out for using. Guy at the halfway house tipped me off to a place Housman likes to hang out in Riverside Park. He had this on him when I found him." Sonny pulled an evidence bag out of his pocket, inside was a small baggie with white powder.

"Well, at least that's some leverage to get him talking."

"I don't think this is our guy. I mean, you think that man," Sonny pointed to the window. "Is capable of avoiding the security camera, getting the vic to open the door, stabbing her with a needle before she could put up a fight, and then transporting and staging the body?"

"No. I don't." Olivia shook her head, disappointed that this turned out to be the dead end that she thought it would be. "I doubt he has much of one, but see if you can get an alibi so we're covering our bases. Then, book him for the meth. Maybe we can kick it to the drug courts and actually get this guy some help."

Sonny nodded, opening the door and stepping inside the interrogation room. "Alright, Mr. Housman…"

Olivia turned back toward her office, rotating her shoulder and wincing at the pain the movement caused. She was definitely going to be feeling it for a couple of days.

* * *

"Look, I'm convening the grand jury. They can come voluntarily or I can issue subpoenas, either way they're testifying." Rafael barked into his phone as he stepped from the hallway and into his outer office, ever present coffee cup held in his left hand.

He swung by Carmen's desk, holding his phone between his cheek and shoulder so he had a hand free to take the mail and messages that she held out for him. He mouthed a silent 'thank you' before retreating into his office.

He sighed and dropped the coffee cup and the mail on his desk, slipping out of his dark brown suit jacket. Plopping in his chair and throwing his feet up on the corner of the desk, he rolled his eyes heavenward as the in house counsel for a tech startup that was suspected of covering up a gang rape that occurred on one of their company retreats continued to drone on about how grand jury testimony could reveal proprietary company information.

"I'm not trying to get them to reveal the super secret code that helps two 20-somethings who happen to be in the same Starbucks go bang in the bathroom." Rafael was really losing his patience with this guy. "You know what, let's make this easier for you. Every single employee that was at the retreat will be receiving a subpoena by the end of the day." He ended the call before the lawyer could even respond and dropped his phone to the desk.

Maybe he should have handed his cases off when he was told to, then he wouldn't be dealing with such morons. But then he'd also miss the chance to take those bastards down for the despicable acts they'd performed on the one woman they'd hired for "diversity".

He picked up the stack of mail and messages that Carmen had given them, flipping through them quickly. When he came to the last envelope in the pile a thread of trepidation ran through him. He wasn't sure why. There was nothing threatening about average white envelope, his name and 1 Hogan Place written out in careful block lettering, but his gut told him he wouldn't like what was inside.

He ripped it open, pulling out an unlined white index card. Written in black marker in those same block letters were the words:  **Did you like my present?**

He stared at the words, trying to decipher their meaning. What present? He'd swear his heart stuttered in his chest when the realization hit. Jaclyn. But no, that couldn't be it. Could it? He shook his head, tossing the card onto his desktop, not wanting to look at it any longer.

Rafael knew he should call Liv and tell her about this. If it was related to Jaclyn this was evidence in their case. But it would also worry her, make her think that someone was after him again.

No, he decided. The note could mean any number of things. He received weird notes and letters all the time, odds were it had nothing to do with Jaclyn's murder. He'd add it to the second threat binder that sat on a shelf behind Carmen's desk, just like he did all the others. At the rate he was going he'd have to start a third pretty soon.

A knock sounded on his door and he actually jumped at the noise. He shook his head, mentally chastising himself as the door opened to reveal Olivia, carrying a plastic bag full of take out containers.

"Liv." He dropped his feet to the floor and slid the index card into a drawer all in one smooth motion. It was like she had a radar, sensing when even a hint of danger befell him. The index card like a siren's song drawing her to him. "Work or pleasure?" He grinned, giving no hint of the guilt that churned within him.

"Well, you cook for me all the time, so I thought I could return the favor." She dropped the bag of food on the table that sat in the middle of the room.

He chuckled, amused at her version of "cooking." He needed to get to work on those subpoenas, but he could spare a half an hour for her. He could always make time for her.

"If this heatwave keeps up, my squad is going to be maxed out on OT." She began to peel off her blazer, which clung to her with sweat. They were in the dog days of summer and their caseload showed it. "People get crazy in the he-"

Air hissed from between Rafael's teeth when he caught a glimpse of her arm and he was immediately on his feet and rounding his desk. "Christ, guerrera, what happened?" Her sleeveless shirt gave him full view of the deep purple bruise that bloomed over her shoulder and spilled down her arm to just a couple inches above her elbow.

"Oh." Olivia looked down at her arm almost as if she'd forgotten about it. "Just a little scuffle with a suspect."

Rafael ran his fingertips over the bruise, light as a feather, and then replaced them with his lips. He hated being reminded of the dangers of her job. He did his best not to think about how any time she hooked that badge to her hipbone and went off to fight another day in the trenches it was a possibility that she wouldn't come back.

She'd already terrified him, first with Lewis, and then when she'd been held in that god forsaken townhouse. They'd only been colleagues then, friends, but he'd still felt like his heart had been ripped out of his chest. And now, now he didn't think he'd survive it if something happened to her.

"I'm fine." She assured him, her tone soft.

"Tell me you at least got a few licks in." He joked now that he was satisfied that the damage was only superficial.

"Actually no," Olivia kissed his lips before sitting down at the table and pulling containers out of the bags. "It was just a man who was in a bad place. I think we're actually going to be able to get him some help."

Rafael slid into the chair next to her and shook his head in amazement. She always managed to find compassion, even for a guy who'd maimed her. He leaned over, wrapping a hand gently behind her neck and pulling her to him. He'd intended it to be just be a quick, soft kiss, but he found that he couldn't pull away. And then, when she parted her lips and allowed his tongue entrance into her mouth, he was powerless to put an end to it.

She wrapped her hand around his navy blue and white striped tie, pulling him closer still and he ran his free hand up her thigh. He was toying with the idea of lowering her zipper when the phone rang in the outer office and he heard Carmen answer in her pleasant tone, making him realize where they were.

He pulled back and cleared his throat. "Sorry. We probably shouldn't do that here."

Olivia just smiled and handed him a set of chopsticks, which he used to dig into his pad thai.

As they ate Olivia filled him in on their progress. It didn't take long since they still didn't have much.

"Phenobarbital?" Rafael let his chopsticks hang in the air. "How hard is that for a layman to get ahold of?"

Olivia shrugged, dipping a spring roll in some sauce. "You can get anything on the internet, but we're looking into it since it's really all we have to go on at the moment."

Guilt settled in the pit of his stomach, the index card hidden in his top desk drawer his own version of a tell-tale heart, thumping loudly to remind him of his secret. The team was struggling and he could have the break they needed - fingerprints, saliva on the envelope, a clue in the handwriting, who knew what all could be found on the simple note - hidden away.

He should tell her, he decided. It was the right thing to do. He opened his mouth to speak, but her phone buzzed on the table. He saw that it was Rollins.

"Hey, Rollins." Olivia answered. "Okay, I'm on my way." Ending the call, she sighed and rubbed a hand over her face.

"Bad news?"

"We just caught another one - sexual assault in broad daylight at Madison Square Park." She stood and he followed suit. "We're already spread so thin. Maybe we're better off letting Homicide take over Jaclyn's case."

Rafael fought an inner battle, the prosecutor vs the boyfriend. As a prosecutor he wanted her on the case, but as her boyfriend he knew that the squad was struggling with only three detectives and that the pressure being placed on her to solve Jaclyn's case was overwhelming.

He rested his hands on her hips. "I know that you're the best cop there is, and that if anyone can find out what happened to her it's you, but that shouldn't come at the sacrifice of your well being. If you need to pass it on, then that's what you should do."

Olivia nodded. She hated the thought of giving up. It wasn't something she ever did, but Homicide had the manpower to dedicate to the case and Jaclyn deserved that.

"I better go."

"Thank you for lunch." He kissed her softly. "Be safe."

"Always."

* * *

"Detective Carisi, isn't it true that once you confronted the defendants with the security footage they changed their story?" Rafael asked later that evening, walking the floor of his office, hands behind his back.

"That's correct. After they saw the footage they admitted to having sex with the victim, but claimed it was consensual." Sonny sat at the table in the center of the room.

Rafael had managed to schedule the grand jury in their gang rape case for the next day and he'd practically begged Olivia to borrow Carisi for an hour. He knew SVU had no time to spare, but Carisi had taken the initial disclosure and was the lead detective on the case so it was imperative that his testimony be solid.

"And what happened when-" Rafael narrowed his eyes at the detective who was looking at his phone screen. "Am I keeping you from something, Detective?"

"Sorry, Counselor." Sonny didn't look up, instead he tapped out a quick reply on his phone and stood. "We just caught another one. I gotta run."

Annoyed, Rafael sighed. "This is becoming a pattern with your squad." But then his own phone was vibrating. "Liv?"

"Where are you?" She skipped any greeting, all business.

"In my office. Carisi and I-"

"Good. He can escort you. I need you down here, but I don't want you traveling alone."

"What are you talking about? What's going on?"

"Just get down here. Now."

Olivia ended the call and he looked up at Carisi who was already at the door. "Apparently I'll be joining you."


	4. Chapter 4

The sun was just starting to fade when Carisi pulled the car to a stop at the address Olivia had given him. This time instead of in an alley downtown they found themselves all the way uptown in Washington Heights, on the edge of Highbridge Park.

It was an all too familiar scene, squad cars parked haphazardly, CSU technicians roaming about collecting evidence, uniformed officers everywhere they looked.

For the second time that week Rafael found himself ducking under crime scene tape, a feat that was easier for him than it was for his tall, lanky companion, he noted.

They spotted Olivia speaking with Melinda over near a set of bushes, an ME's assistant was zipping up a black body bag near their feet.

"Good, you're here." Olivia said when she caught sight of them over Melinda's shoulder. She left Melinda to her work and approached them.

"Was it him again?" Carisi asked and Olivia nodded. "Got an ID?"

"Not yet."

"So it's not another ADA?" Rafael asked.

"No. It's not." Her tone was somber and he wondered what that meant. Obviously it was a somber occasion, but wasn't it good news that it wasn't an ADA?

"Fin and Rollins are helping with the canvas." She was addressing Sonny again. "I need you to speak with the Parks Department. There are cameras all through this park and we need the footage from last night."

"Last night? She was here all day?" Carisi asked.

"According to Melinda's estimate, yes. She was tucked up under some bushes and this path is off the main strip of the park. It took awhile for someone to spot her." Olivia explained.

"I better get to it." Sonny turned on his heel, pulling out his phone to search for a contact number for the Parks Department.

"So, I'm probably going to regret asking this, but why am I here?" Rafael asked once it was just the two of them.

"I need to see if you can ID the body."

"What? But I thought...you said it wasn't…"

Olivia rarely saw him unable to put a sentence together, and she felt bad for causing him distress. She should have told him more on the phone, but at the time she'd been busy coordinating a dozen uniforms and trying to wrangle her detectives.

"It's not an ADA, at least we don't think so. There was no badge, but your business card was found with... _on_  the body."

Confusion clouded his handsome features. "What? Who could…" He started for the body bag, a pressing need to know overpowering his aversion to such things.

Olivia put her hand on his arm and shook her head. "You don't want to do that. She was out in the heat all day and it's just...better that you don't." She pulled out her phone, flipping to a photo, as two ME's assistants lifted the body onto a gurney behind them.

When he saw the picture he was grateful she'd stopped him from looking at the actual body. Even in photo form the clouded over brown eyes set in the ashen, heat bloated face was enough to turn his stomach, and he was grateful that he hadn't eaten since Olivia had stopped by for lunch over eight hours ago.

"I can't...I don't…" He tried to focus on her actual features and not the evidence of the weather accelerated decomp, but it was difficult. "I don't think I know who she is. I'm sorry."

She dropped the phone. "Okay. It's okay." She assured him, putting a hand gently on his elbow and leading him out of the way as the gurney was wheeled past them. The lamps that lit the pathways of the park kicked on as the sun continued to dip and she wondered if it was the lighting making his skin look so pale.

"But she had my business card?"

"It was super glued to her stomach." She found another picture and showed it to him. This one of just a nude torso, his card prominently displayed a couple inches above the bellybutton. "I guess he didn't want to risk it falling off."

Rafael suddenly felt light headed and his chest felt tight, like he'd lost the ability to take in any air. A woman was dead,  _another_  woman was dead, and it was because of him. There was no doubt now. Somehow, in a way he couldn't figure out, this was his fault. And he didn't even know who she was. She'd lost her life because of him and he couldn't even tell Olivia her fucking name.

He tried to breathe in, tried to fight some much needed oxygen into his constricted lungs, but he was failing. Life's most basic task and he was unable to complete it. He put a hand on his chest, almost as if he could will it to expand, but he continued to struggle.

"Hey, hey, you're okay. You're okay." Olivia soothed, leading him over to a bench. Rafael sat numbly, his quick, shallow breaths emitting a wheezing sound that sent fear through her. She unbuttoned his vest and loosened his tie, trying to remove some of the constriction. At least he'd forgone his jacket due to the heat. "Breathe, Raf. Just breathe. C'mon, deep breaths." She looked around, spotting Melinda just starting to climb in the ME van. "Melinda!"

The doctor spotted her and immediately jumped down out of the van, rushing over.

"I think he's having a panic attack." Olivia said, standing up to move out of Melinda's way.

Without questioning the cause, Melinda knelt down in front of Rafael, putting her hands on his knees. "Look at me, Barba." Her tone was soft, but commanding. Olivia felt a little relief when he shifted his gaze from the ground to Melinda. "You are okay. It's just a panic attack. I just need you to take a slow, deep breath for me. Can you do that?"

Rafael gave an almost imperceptible nod, doing his best to follow her directions, taking a breath that was just the slightest bit deeper.

"That's good." Melinda encouraged. "That's good, just like that. Slow, deep breaths. You're okay."

Slowly, very very slowly, his breathing returned to normal and he started to get his color back. Olivia was flooded with relief. She'd had panic attacks of her own, but being on the outside of one, watching someone she loved suffer through it was almost more terrifying than experiencing it herself.

"Do you think you're okay?" Melinda asked, looking up at him. He nodded. "Okay, I'll let Olivia take it from here."

"Thank you, Melinda." Olivia told the doctor as she walked past her.

"Of course." Melinda put a reassuring hand on her arm briefly before continuing on her way.

Olivia returned to her position on the bench next to Rafael. She put a hand on his cheek, running her thumb over the planes of his face, not caring who saw. She just needed the connection.

He turned into her hand, closing his eyes for a moment, needing it as much as she did. When he finally opened his eyes, they were a deep emerald, a shade that would be breathtakingly beautiful if she didn't know that it was a sign that he was distressed. "There's not much more that can be done tonight. Let me take you home."

"Okay." His voice was rough, his throat dry from his quick, panicked breathing, but he stood, a little shaky on his feet, and took her hand.

* * *

He was quiet on the drive back downtown, but Olivia took solace in the sound of his deep, even breathing. She concentrated on it instead of the fear threatening to bubble up to the surface. It'd been her gut feeling all along that this centered on him, but having proof of it made her blood run cold.

"You don't have to park." Rafael told her when he realized she was searching for a spot on his block, the first words he'd spoken since they left the park. "Just drop me off."

"I thought that I might stay." She glanced over at him.

"Noah?"

"Lucy is going to stay with him. I asked her to when I first got called about the body, in case it was going to be a long night."

"Well, I don't need a babysitter." His tone wasn't angry, just matter of fact.

"I don't think you need a babysitter." Olivia finally eyed a space between a large black SUV and a Prius, the size of which only a seasoned New York driver could squeeze a car into. "I just thought that you could use the company, but if you want I'll go home." She said, but continued to maneuver the car next to the curb.

Even through the cloud of emotions he was feeling he still managed to be impressed with the skill she exhibited, sliding the car into the space with ease. "No. I'm sorry. Stay."

With the look he gave her she couldn't leave even if she tried. The vulnerability in his eyes made him look so young, not unlike the awkward teenager she'd seen in photos supplied by Lucia.

Once they were inside Rafael pulled his already loosened tie from his neck and kicked off his shoes. "Is it okay if we just go to bed?" It was only a little after ten, but he was exhausted.

"Of course." Olivia followed him to the bedroom and she found her bag that she kept in his closet. She didn't stay here often since with Noah it was easier for them to stay at her place, but she still kept things here just in case. It wasn't anything elaborate like the three suits hanging in garment bags in her closet, on a rotation of course to keep from repeating, but it was still a little part of her in his world.

They silently got ready for bed, following the routine they'd perfected over the weeks, taking turns sharing the sink.

Once under his plush duvet, Rafael stared at the ceiling and Olivia turned on her side to face him.

"Absolutely none of this is your fault." She finally broke their silence. She'd said the sentence hundreds of times over the course of her career, but maybe never with as much love and sincerity as she did when they left her lips in that moment.

He rolled to face her, burying his hands in her hair and kissing her tenderly, desperation vibrating just below the surface. Even when his lips pulled away he left his hand gripped in her hair, his forehead pressed against hers..

"I love you." He whispered finally, opening his eyes to meet hers.

"I love you too." She lifted her chin to kiss him briefly. "Are you okay?"

"Not even close." He shook his head as much as he could with their foreheads still touching. "Thank you for staying with me."

"I'm here for you always." Olivia promised, snuggling in close to him, her breath tickling his neck.

He wrapped an arm around her shoulders, pulling her even closer, holding on for dear life.

* * *

In the morning Olivia found him in the kitchen and he was Barba again. He sat at the island, which doubled as his kitchen table, sipping coffee as he studied the files spread out on the marble surface. Steel gray polka dot suspenders rested on a striped shirt and not a hair was out of place.

She was a little disappointed. Of course he was attractive in what she'd lovingly began referring to as his uniform, he was  _always_  attractive, but she loved getting to see him first thing in the morning. She was sure very few people had ever seen him with sleep heavy eyes, hair standing every which way, cheeks covered in stubble, and she loved that she got the privilege.

"I feel underdressed." Olivia pulled at the hem of her long t-shirt as she made her way to the coffee pot.

He felt affection bloom warm in his chest when she took a drink of the coffee without a grimace. She'd grown used to his ridiculously strong home brew. He didn't think he'd ever been with anyone long enough for that to happen.

"If it were up to me that's what you'd wear to work." He smirked at her over the rim of his porcelain mug.

She fixed him with a scrutinizing gaze as she leaned back against the counter and brought her own mug to her lips for a welcome second sip. "You seem to be doing better."

He should have known flirting with her wouldn't distract her from the previous night's events.

Truthfully, he wasn't doing better, at all. He was tired, he was stressed, and he was embarrassed that a dozen uniforms and half of CSU had seen him have a break down at the crime scene. He'd had one other panic attack in his entire life and that was the night before he took the New York bar exam. At least then he'd had the decency to be alone in his apartment when it occurred.

But none of that compared to the guilt that was eating him alive. Every time he'd closed his eyes the night before all he'd seen was that photo on Olivia's phone, the victim's foggy eyes staring back at him. Finally, around 4am, careful not to wake Liv, he'd slipped out of bed, figuring if he wasn't going to sleep he could at least work.

"I'm...choosing to focus on work." He hedged. "I have the Wexler Tech grand jury this afternoon and I lost a lot of prep time."

She just nodded and sipped her coffee, watching as he returned his focus to the files, picking up his pen to scribble something on his legal pad.

"I want to get you a detail." She said finally, her tone calm.

He sighed and dropped his pen. He'd been waiting for this. "No."

"Raf, there's clearly some psycho out there with an axe to grind. How long until he gets impatient playing this little game and comes for you?"

"I'm sleeping with the toughest cop there is. I'm safe with you."

An involuntary smile flashed across her lips, but it disappeared almost immediately. "I appreciate the flattery, but I can't be with you 24/7."

"This guy isn't even after me. It seems he's hell bent on hurting women with a connection to me." Not that he had any idea who the latest victim was, but he was sure once she was identified it would come out that they'd crossed paths at some point. "By that logic, you should be the one with the security detail, not me."

"You just said it, I'm the toughest cop there is. I can take care of myself."

"So, we're in agreement. Neither of us need security." A cocky grin twitched at his lips as her eyes narrowed, but he managed to keep it at bay.

"I hate it when you lawyer me."

"It's a reflex. I can't help it."

She sat her mug on the counter and came around the island, resting her left elbow on the marble surface, facing him. "In that case, how about we make a deal, counselor?"

"I'm listening." He leaned in close to her.

"Why don't you work out of the precinct? If you need to go to the courthouse someone will escort you, and the rest of the time you'll be with me."

"So I get to spend more time with you and avoid having strangers follow me everywhere?" He skimmed his fingers absentmindedly up and down her bare thigh. "You drive a hard bargain, Lieutenant."

"So it's a deal?"

"It is.  _If_ ," he added. "I can bring Carmen with me."

She laughed and looped her arms casually around his neck. "I'm sure we can find space for the both of you. My squad room isn't exactly overflowing with manpower these days."

"Then, yes, it's a deal." He placed a peck on her lips to seal the deal, a much more pleasant confirmation than a handshake. "And now that we've established how absolutely safe I'll be under your watchful eye, I need to tell you about something." Only adding to his guilt had been knowing that he was hiding the note from her. He couldn't bring back Jaclyn or the Jane Doe, but this he could fix.

"Why do I feel like you're about to piss me off?"

"Because I am."


End file.
